They've actually invaded our garden now. Mum went into town today to find out about this burial site thing. She left me in bed. So when I eventually got up and pulled the curtains, there they were, the next door neighbours, bold as brass, standing in our garden! Well Tom and Sam anyway. My first instinct was to go running outside and yell at them to bugger off but then I changed my mind. Mainly because I was in my Simpsons pyjamas and didn't want Julie to see me like that (she might have been looking from her house) and also because I wanted to just watch and see what they were doing.

They had that piece of paper out, the one they were looking at in their garden the other day. Tom turned it around a couple of times and then started pointing over to where Mum grows her veggies. Sam moved over there and prodded the earth with his finger. He nodded. Tom leaned over the fence and picked up a spade that was leaning against it on their side. Thats when I thought it was time to act.

So, Simpson pyjamas or not I went storming out into the garden. "What do you think you're doing?" I yelled. They both jumped about six foot in the air (that was satisfying!).

"I...we...lost some washing off the line," Tom stuttered. "We were just seeing if it had blown over here."

They obviously thought they weren't going to get caught cos that was a lame excuse, man. "What do you need a spade for then?" I asked.

"It's one we borrowed," Tom said. "I was just returning it."

What a liar! But I didn't argue. I just said, "Right." And he put the spade down and then walked round the front and into their house. When Mum came back and I told her she just shrugged. I thought she'd go mental. I'm beginning to think she's as weird as they are. She flips her lid when I go into their garden, dyes her hair green over a stupid field but shrugs when we get trespassed on!

Do you know what's really strange though? Ever since they've left the garden it's been full of crows. Great big black ugly ones. And they look like they're watching for something.